Dream A Little Dream

“And then little Billy woke up and it was all a dream.” -a cliche ending-line

“And then little Billy woke up and sparkled like a motherfucker.” – Stephanie Meyer

“And then little Billy woke up and there were horrors so terrible that I can’t describe them. So I won’t. Nyeahhh.” -H. P. Lovecraft

“And then little Billy woke up and seven generations later his great-grandson led a coup d’etat in Argentina.” – Gabriel Garcia Marquez

“And then little Billy woke up and it was all a dream but it wasn’t a dream and then there was a dream within a dream and then they all ate pies.” -David Lynch

“And then little Billy woke up to about 800 more pages of hardship and despair.” -Charles Dickens

“And then little Billy woke up and realized he was a giant cockroach.” -Franz Kafka

“And then little Billy woke up and he realized that giant cockroaches were a metaphor for the Shoah.” -every critic of Franz Kafka ever

“And then little Billy woke up and discovered that she had a sexually-transmitted fantasy village on her butt.” -Cat Valente

“And then little Billy woke up and his wife was eaten by a wolf and his daughter was gangbanged by a team of saucy serving wenches and all this was retold from the point of view of seventeen characters.” -George R R Martin

“And then little Billy woke up and really wished he hadn’t. Because being a Jew is hard. So very hard.” -Philip Roth

“And then little Billy woke up and META. Yes. META.” -Douglas Hofstadter

“And then little Billy woke up and down and all around and side to side and glippity glide!” -Dr. Seuss

“And then little Billy woke up and found he was President. Because he had HONOR.” -Tom Clancy

“And then little Billy woke up, noticed how lovely and relatable the world was, and about ten minutes later there was an Event which made everything terrible forever.” -Stephen King

“And then little Billy woke up and WHALES ARE JESUS.” -Herman Melville

etc., etc., etc.

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~ by davekov on 24 July 2011.

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